Just in Case
by OswinHolmes
Summary: Dean tries to tell Cas how he feels.


"Cas please, I'm exhausted. I can not do that again," Dean pants.

"Dean one more time, please?" Cas says in the most pleading voice he can manage.

"Fine, fine just one more time!"

"Thank you Dean."

Dean heaves himself from the bar stool, and approached the skeeball machine with Cas trailing him. The red machine sings and the flashing lights hurt Dean's sleep deprived eyes. Cas stares at the hunter, anticipating the rolling balls. Dean feeds the machine a couple of bucks, and makes his way back to the bar. Cas beams towards Dean when he get a highscore, and Dean gives him a thumbs up.

"He's pretty good," A woman's voice says to Dean's left.

"Yeah he-" Dean turns toward the woman, "Son of a bitch!"

"Hello," Meg says.

"Just because he likes you now, don't think I won't jank you the first chance I get."

"tsk tsk you wouldn't want to upset your boyfriend... now would you?"

Dean turns away from Meg, "Cas is not my boyfriend."

"If that's what gets you to sleep at night big guy," Meg jabs.

Dean moves away from Meg and his whiskey, retrieving Cas from the toy claws.

"Come on Cas," Dean says, his hand on the other man's broad shoulder.

"But-" Cas tried to argue.

"I said one more," Dean said with finality.

"Fine."

Dean felt a pang of guilt, but it wasn't enough to persuade him to stay at the bar. He turned to Meg, who smirked and Dean hurried Cas out. The two men got in the familiar black Impala, and started driving to the cabin.

"You know we're not boyfriends right, Cas?" Dean blurts out his eyes glued to the road.

"Yes of course…" Cas said slowly, looking at Dean curiously.

"Good," Dean says.

The lights of the highway illuminated the interior of the car, throwing lights on Dean's face and making his face looking sharper.

"Cas what's heaven's policy on a dude liking another dude?" Dean says finally, breaking the strained silence.

"Man shall not lie with a man as one lies with a female; it is an abomination," Cas explains.

"Oh right but what if he isn't a man though."

"Why are you asking me this Dean?"

The hunter doesn't answer his friend, staring ahead again. Cas doesn't press him any further, knowing that Dean would just get defensive if pushed too far. The angel sat, his insides turning in an unfamiliar, and uncomfortable way. He tried to identify feeling and the phrase "butterflies in the stomach" came to the angels mind.

"Dean what does it mean to have butterflies in your stomach?"

"It's when you get nervous or something like that. I don't know Cas!"

Cas stared at his fingers, not looking at his friend. Did Dean make him nervous? Of course he did, Dean had always made him nervous.

"Do I make you have butterflies Dean?"

"No. Well sort of," Dean says quietly.

Before Cas asking him anything, Dean lurches the car to the side of the highway. Dean throws the car door open, and gets out of the car. Cas follows him out confused at what was wrong with his friend.

"Cas listen to me, okay? There's something I need to tell you."

"What is it Dean?"

Dean paces back and forth in front of the car, rubbing his hands together as if they were cold.

"Here's the thing, do you remember how I said we weren't boyfriends?"  
"Yes."

Dean looked frantic like the words were choking and drowning him. Cas felt the urge to comfort. How would he even do that?

"Well I kind of have boyfriend-ish feelings for you."

"What does that mean?"

Dean puffs up his cheeks and exhales loudly. His eyes pleading pleading with the angel to understand him. The hunter felt vulnerable and out in the open which he hated.

"Dammit Cas! It means I love you."

"Yes you're like a brother to me Dean," Cas says.

"I mean more than that like a boyfriend."

Cas's brain was reeling he couldn't process what Dean was saying. He had just said that they weren't boyfriends. Cas felt the butterflies return to his stomach.

"But you said-"

"I know what I said!"

Before Cas could inquire further, Dean was closer to Cas then he had ever been. The hunter always kept everyone at an arms length, especially Cas. Cas opened his mouth to ask Dean what he meant but before a single sound could escape from the angel Dean's lips were pressed against Cas's. Cas stood frozen, he didn't know what to do. Dean broke away from Cas and looked up at the stars.

"I just wanted to do that once just in case, you know, if I die and don't come back again," Dean says quietly as if he's praying.


End file.
